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September 04 What is this weird feeling?Lately I've been feeling very strange. I sleep soundly, I haven't had any chest pains, I've even started to eat healthier (not less, just heathlier). I find myself laughing more easily. When things don't go well, I only utter a single curse rather than a half hour tirade. If I didn't know better I'd almost say I was happy.
I think I know why I've such as change in outlook. I've stopped giving a fuck about my job. Management and their minions are just fucked up and I don't care anymore. I'm so grateful. I used to believe that satisfaction and pride in a job well done was important. I'm free of those quaint notions.
I'm not going to beat myself up about it taking me so long to come to my senses. The values instilled by your parents are not easily dislodged from one's psyche. But with the constant bombardment of stupid assholes who never get called on their shit, any work ethic can be utterly destroyed. Just make sure you have a therapist and/or alcohol to soothe the pain. Principles leave a big hole when they've been pried loose. April 13 Halo HusbandRode the bike again today. I didn't get around to it until mid-afternoon (was aiming for morning) because I didn't drag myself out of bed until 11 am. I got a rotten night's sleep 'cause my husband was shouting smack talk playing Halo. That's how he behaves after drinking too much Bawls and absinthe. I let him know if he did it again I was disconnecting the DSL. I hope I can get up early enough to get in a work out tomorrow morning. April 12 Confession: The Exercise BikeLast December I bought this expensive-ass exercise bike . I'm a horrific blend of money-conscious and anal retentive. If I spend a lot of money on something, that's practically a guarantee that I will use it and take extra special care of it. I just knew
 that there was no way this bike would sit and collect dust after I spent almost $900.00 bucks ($500.00 plus warranty and in-home assembly).Boy was I wrong! I used the bike for one week in January and my expensive toy has sat and collected dust until today. I wanted my well points, so I got on and did the Level 2 workout on the SD card that comes with the bike. My thigh muscles sang a bit, but I was able to make it through the whole 20 minutes. We'll see if I can still walk tomorrow. August 27 UgggghhhhhhI spent last Saturday puking harder than I have in a long time. I don't know if it was food poisoning or some short term bug but here it is Monday and I still feel like I've been kicked in the chest by a mule. I'm tired and it hurts to draw a deep breath. To top it all off I've got a sinus headache. This is not going to be a productive day. |
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